Category: Life decisions

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NaPoWriMo Early Bird Prompt: Haibun – Host Duty

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I wrote a Haibun with the NaPoWriMo early bird Prompt. It is on my first open mic Host Duty at Joe Montoya’s Poetry Unplugged in Sacramento, CA:

On March 30, 2017:

I went to Luna’s cafe to be a spectator or performer for the open mic night. But I was bestowed an uncommon opportunity: I became the host of Joe Montoya’s poetry unplugged. Unbelievable. I have a café packed with a great audience, a half – filled list of eager performers and poet wanting to get on stage, and no feature to showcase their work.

I was definitely going to work some magic in this room tonight. But, I pulled it off and it worked out. So, attending Joe Montoya’s Poetry Unplugged for a year and 9 months,  I have worked every open mic show role.  I have performed on that stages as an amateur, a feature (Duo and Solo), and now a host. So let’s see what is next? Owner?

Opportunity
New host rises from the crowd
New journey begins

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39’s Last words

I turned 40 in December. Hooray, 22 years as an adult.  Since, this is my new decade mark, my 39 year old self left me an audio recording. He encourage me that I need to push forward and take care of some loopholes that he wasn’t able to complete.

Here are a few ideas:

  • Take risks.
  • Artists have problems
  • Enjoy your 40s
  • Travel more.
  • Make Christmas enjoyable
  • Eat better
  • Do not conform
  • Expand on poetry

Take Risk

I have never thought that my age would play a big role to my insecurity. But, I have become aware of repeated financial and economical disasters that have drop me back to square two. Plus, Living with a Loner’s mentality has let me accept solitude than a relationship. I need to take more changes with my life because playing it safe is not giving me satisfaction .

Artists have problems

Many friends and associates  have problems greater than mine. But I am surprise Why? I never assumed what problems are really out there.  My childhood had flaws.  Hell, my unique name still bothers me. But, people faced some harsh decisions.  I have admiration for them.

No Conformity

I tried to conform to what society has foretold my generation for so long. Get good grade, graduate college, get a Job, work fatefully, get married, have a family, get a house, pay your taxes and insurance, and enjoy retirement. None of these action happen smoothly.

But I went down an alternate route:

I went to the military then community college and university(which took 7 years to graduate), I work retail and warehouse jobs to rent, I work fatefully until jobs fired me several times, I have never been married but I have kids from two lovely women, never own a house, and have been punish by taxes and insurance increases.

I have spent most of my life with this concept that does not work for me. Even when I saw different avenues, I was reminded that I should follow the traditional way. If you research several accomplished people, you will find out that they didn’t follow the concept. So why are we still telling people that traditional works?

Live better

Do ever think that this could be your final year? I have started to become more aware of my mortality. I don’t want to die but I have no control to the decision. So do you feel satisfied? Is your work done? Or do you fear nothing is finished or ready? I have read and listen to many philosophers discuss the end game. We all know it is coming yet we still view it as a distance future. Well, this is not true. So what are you not doing that should be done?

Overall

My life reflection has good and bad events but some those events were necessary  for the next one to happen.  Living with notion gives me lukewarm feelings but humans are so active to search for the negative that the positive never feels incredible.  I have family and friends that view me as a young adult still growing up or gritty veteran.  In short, my 40s are new shoes for me.  So, I  better get comfortable in them because I will be in them for awhile.

 

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The Holidays (for Loners & Soldiers)

Soldier’s Mentality

I considered myself lucky. The soldier life has taught me about camaraderie and  appreciate my collection of friends and loved ones. Yet, even I have fallen victim to solitude for the holidays. The lonely feeling still remains, even though, the trainings and battles are behind me. So, I still carry a soldier’s mentality for the holidays: 1) Appreciate it with loved ones and family. and/or 2) Create new traditions while being solo. These ideas helped me survive those lonely hard times during the holiday.

Continue reading “The Holidays (for Loners & Soldiers)”

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Bull Hunting

I was happy to find the Goldman and Sach Bull but, there was a crowd surrounding it. Everybody wanted a picture with the bull including myself. Some people even tried to mount it. I was hoping they fell off. But this caught my attention: the amount of people who touch the bull’s nether regions. Even more surprising: it was the shiny part on a brass bull. Continue reading “Bull Hunting”

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My Interview

I was excited to have an interview done on me. I like to thank Izzy Lala for doing an interview on me and my poetry pieces. It was an amazing experience to see me from someone else’s point of view. Plus, I started to understand the image that I projected publicly. The statement of being a tone setter is interesting since I, primarily, sign up as the first poet that starts the show.

My roots with poetry are premature. I have been rapping since I was 10 years old. So, alot of my poems were turned into rap lyrics immediately. Some people say that Rapping is not poetry. I question the remark because evolution is a recurring event. So, when poets view new or strange styles of poetry, they need to understand the importance is still the words. I thought about how I would define my own. I always assumed poetry was similar to a painting or music. I made it for someone to check it out and they created their own interpretation. But reading Austin Kleon’s book, Show Your Work, states my work can’t tell stories itself.

My poetry is my work.

Check out Izzy Lala interview of me:

Seeking The Mic

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Pedro

So, my friend, Pedro, is leaving for Minnesota to persue his law degree today. I met him performing poetry at Luna’s cafe. We became friends. Plus, he was in the Army, so we had several stories to share. Everytime, he would get on stage, I would shout “P” from my seat. I was definitely one of his fans.

Continue reading “Pedro”

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A Good Deed or Panda Express 

No good deed goes unpunished

After a long day at work, I hopped on the light rail heading to 16th St station. It was running behind schedule, so the light rail was packed with people trying to escape downtown. I had to squeeze out the door when I arrived at the station.

I headed to Safeway to grab a sandwich but, was stop by a homeless gentleman. He asked if I could buy him a meal at Panda express. I wasn’t interested in getting food there, so I told him I could get him food from Safeway. He agreed.

Continue reading “A Good Deed or Panda Express “